Howdy, gang. Welcome to the morning anxiety crew. We wake up screaming. But only on the inside. We're respectful of our roommates that we still have in our 30s. So Cassie works a double today, a full 12 hours, so I have plenty of time to catch up on my writing and put in a job application.
TWO THINGS I AM GRATEFUL FOR (SPECIFIC)
1. I am grateful for my In-laws (talk about a generational swerve, eh!). They made plans to take Cassie to see The Little Mermaid because the animated film was her favorite as a kid. I took the opportunity to bow out because I have no interest and my in-laws worried that they had unintentionally excluded me, which is so goddamn sweet.
2. I am grateful ... ah hell. I'm having another one of those days. I am grateful for Rage Against the Machine. I've been feeling awful about the state of the world and they are perfect for that mood. And hey, sometimes you gotta be grateful for something as simple as some good music.
ONE THING THAT WENT WELL DURING THE DAY
Yesterday was a lot. I spent a lot of spoons just to get to the end of the day. But! I showed up. I wrote, just not as much as I'd hoped. Never let perfect be the enemy of the good, right? Celebrate small victories. If I say it enough I'll believe it.
ONE ABSOLUTELY CRITICAL ACTION ITEM FOR THE DAY
Alright. Time to get down to brass tacks. Gotta do some writing. Gotta do some bullet journaling. Gotta dedicate some time to a job application no matter how hopeless it all feels. I think the most critical action item for the day though is getting in under 21 grams of Saturated Fat.
Sometimes I worry that this blog contributes more to my anxiety than it alleviates it. Which in and of itself is concerning. If this little amount of self-reflection makes my adrenaline spike that bodes poorly for my emotional wellbeing, to say the least.
This is not me saying that I intend to stop blogging, more so it's a thing I want to become more aware of. In a big way, it's just this overwhelming feeling of spinning my wheels and not making headway. When I sit down to blog I have to push past all that and keep my chin up.
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